The Girl in the Red Sweater

After checking out FindYourSpot.com, we thought that northwestern Arkansas might be the right place for us. Kansas City is just too urban, and San Antonio is too… well, among other things, it’s too hot. So, in hopes of tracking down a good place for us to live, we took a little vacation to Arkansas.

Boy, were we disappointed.

Sure, there is beautiful scenery. Lots of hills and some lovely mountains, nice deciduous trees whose leaves actually change colors in the fall. Oh, and they have seasons there, unlike here.

But it’s kind of… boring. And everyone either has to work at a Tyson chicken plant or the university.

Still, I found one major perk: this lovely cinnamon roll.

No, that’s not a salad plate. That’s a 9″x8″ cinnamon roll. And boy, was it tasty!

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Happy Moment of the Day

Well, we didn’t find a “bustling shopping district” in the area we were told was the coolest part of town. There was pretty much a row of somewhere between 5 and 10 bars and a handful of shops. But we did discover the one redeeming grace of Fayetteville, Arkansas: the coolest bookstore I’ve ever seen.

The only truly enjoyable part of our stay there, aside from watching “Enchanted” and seeing the Christmas lights on the square, was this store. The Dickson Street Bookstore.

The photo above is the only really straight one of a labyrinth of halls. Most of the store is chopped up into 5- to 15-foot walls, and as you can see, everything is piled to the ceiling. (There are plenty of ladders and library-style footstools around.)

They have a very disappointing website — which I couldn’t even find again when I wanted to put a link here — but if you’re ever in the area, you should really check them out.

The atmosphere alone is worth a drive, although I didn’t find any of the books I was looking for. It’s much more of a “come see what you can find” type of place rather than a “find what you seek” store. They did have a lot of books by many of my favorite authors.

Oh, and did I mention they have A HUNDRED THOUSAND BOOKS? When I mean coolest bookstore ever, I mean BIG BOOKSTORE.

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• Log into your blog.
• Click “Manage” at the top of the Administration Screen.
• Click on the smaller ”Categories” link underneath Manage.
• Click “Edit” next to the category you want to rename.
• Rename the category, input a description if you wish, and click “Add Category.”

You can also add a category from this page using the “Add New” link next to the “Categories” header.

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If you only want one category:

• Log into your account.
• Click “Blogroll” at the top of the Administration Screen.
• Click on “Categories” underneath the Blogroll link.
• Click the “Edit” link next to Blogroll.
• Rename the category and change the slug to something similar. If your category is “Fun Stuff,” you might want a slug of “fun-stuff”. Type in a description if you want to (not required), and click “Add Category.”

If you want to have multiple categories:

• Start by following the steps above for your first category.
• On the same Blogroll Categories screen, click “Add New.”
• Fill out the form and click “Add Category.”
• Click “Manage” and then “Edit” whichever post you want to move to the new category.
• Check the box next to the category you’re moving the post to, and click Save.

You can use as many categories as you like. Just keep in mind that if you are using Custom Permalinks, the search engines have already made note of where your pages are, and changing the categories will change their addresses. You will need to do a 301 redirect so everyone will know where the posts have moved.

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Every once in awhile, when I happen to glance down at my shoes, I usually notice one thing:

My shoes do not look like the shoes of a manager.

Now, while my main concern in attire is comfort and function, I do occasionally care what other people think about me. I care the most when someone looks at me like a little girl who doesn’t know what she’s talking about.

Funky flip-flops do not in any way help your case when you are trying to explain that you have a degree in graphic design to back up your insistence that a picture taken on a camera phone is not actually high enough quality to enlarge to a 4′ x 8′ banner.

(Not that I wear the flip-flops every day, of course. I usually put on a comfy pair of New Balance tennis shoes. They’re fairly plain and do not, at least, take away from my credibility. But it seems like the days I choose to wear flip-flops are the days I need that credibility the most.)

So I decided to do something about my problem. Being a logical person, I analyzed why I like the flip-flops so much — they keep my feet cooler than sneakers, and they’re a pretty shade of blue — and then decided to seek out reasonably comfortable sandals that look a bit more, well, grown-up.

A search at the nearest Payless on my lunch break found the right sandals, but alas, they only had my size in black. For some reason the contrasting beige stitching made them look really cheap to me. So I decided to set out on a quest to find the right size in the much more tasteful brown.

Alas, I was also destined to find a pair of sneakers that stole my heart.

These cute little clearance shoes — clearance shoes being one of the reasons, in fact, that I do not go shoe shopping more than twice a year — grabbed my attention immediately. I am still an ’80s child at heart, and this is exactly the kind of shoes I would have begged, borrowed and stolen (well, not really, but I didn’t come up with the expression) to get in about the sixth grade. I had to laugh, and then I had to try them on.

It’s not often that I try on a pair of shoes and actually feel comfort, but these were just right. Well, one half-size too small, but otherwise so comfortable it was time for a combined quest.

Six hours and two Paylesses later (six hours because I had to get through the rest of the work day, not because I was shopping!) I had found both the sandals I originally wanted, in my size, and the antithesis of my original goal (in that crucial half-size larger). But I just couldn’t bring myself to leave without the heart shoes. Comfort, cuteness, and a clearance pricetag are just too much to pass up when it comes to shoes.

If only the sandals were as comfortable. They are just comfortable enough and so much nicer-looking than my dirty sneakers that I will wear them fairly often, but the notorious heart shoes are so comfortable I will say “To heck with people who don’t respect me because of my footwear!” at least half as often.

I guess they say nature remains in balance for a reason.

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Okay, okay. So I know I could be out there in the world doing something with other actual people, or even at home doing something more physically challenging than sitting on the couch. But there are some TV shows I just love. Here are a few of them, along with why I love them:

Passport to Europe: A lovely show on the Travel Channel, this show conveniently comes on twice in a row – over my lunch hour. In the middle of my work day, I really need a break from thinking, and this completely takes my mind off my worries. It’s like a mini vacation on my lunch break.

Gilmore Girls: I’m not sure why I love it so much, but I do. Maybe it’s the sarcastic wit so thoroughly ingrained in the show that you almost have to rewind and listen to every conversation twice to get all the nuances. Maybe it’s the cute little New England town. Maybe I just need a peek into someone else’s hectic life. In any event, I am addicted and am not ashamed to say that I own all but the very last season (and that is soon to change!).

How I Met Your Mother: This one is obviously because it is absolutely hilarious. Every Monday is bearable because I have this wonderful show to look forward to, again to take my mind off work.

The Big Bang Theory: I don’t know how they topped How I Met Your Mother, but they did. This is a very similarly hilarious show that is uncannily reminiscent of several geeks I have known. This show would be funny regardless of who you are, but if you have ever known a true geek, it really hits home. If Numb3rs has you smiling and shaking your head at geeks, try this show for laughs!

Once I have had my two-comedy Monday night fix, I can actually think about my own life before bed. (If you’re beginning to sense a pattern here, you can tell that I constantly have things rushing around in my brain, thoughts rushing by so fast I don’t even fully think about them. TV is one of my favorite escapes – as long as I choose a few of the right shows, it crowds everything else out of my brain and gives it a well-deserved break.)

Ugly Betty: I started watching this show because I had absolutely, positively nothing to do at work one day (I had already Disk Cleaned, Defragged, run Ad-Aware and Avast, vacuumed, and swept) and was looking for some boredom relief. Thanks to ABC’s neat “watch TV online” deal, I have been hooked ever since. It’s one of those shows that is not always the best thing you ever saw, and not always all that funny even though it’s a sitcom, but I fell so deeply in love with the characters and I can’t help but want to know what is going to happen with Betty and Henry.

And that’s it – aside from these shows, you will rarely see me watching any TV. Sure, a weekend movie here or there, but that’s about it. With my fancy DVR, I can even record my favorites and they don’t interfere with my other plans. (Not that there are that many to interfere with.)

December update: As I’m still waiting to get my hands on the seventh and final season of the Gilmores, I have become addicted to two new shows:

Stargate SG-1: I really didn’t care for this show at first, but Hubby always adored it, and when it came out on $20-per-season DVDs we brought the first season home. That was about two months ago. Last night I had to bring home season 4. Once you get into the show, it’s totally addictive. I can never wait to see what new crazy puzzle they have to solve — SciFi really did a great job on this series, and it couldn’t have been cheap.

Kid Nation: I don’t like many reality shows at all, but as I was flipping through channels the first night this aired, it caught my eye, and I’ve enjoyed watching it ever since. I hope Taylor learns something from her experience, and I’ve enjoyed seeing some of the others mature. I don’t think I could have gone through all 40 days as a kid – all of them are brave.

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Since I’m such a visual person, I have decided to take a very visual approach to achieving my goals.

I created a goal board.

Being the manager of a sign shop, I have certain perks that include dibs on leftover signs. I just happened to find one nice 4′ wide by 3′ tall sign, which I proceeded to strip down to a nice blank slate. I hung it on my wall so I could tape up whatever tickles my goal fancy without hurting the paint.

I cracked open a new box of Crayolas and went to town, then promptly stuck my large poster onto the sign to showcase my goals for November.

• Put the goals up on the wall!
• Clean up the apartment. (Every nook and cranny of it.)
• Sell the stuff I don’t use.
• Clean the car out. (Every nook and cranny of it.)
• Go to the driving range at least once.
• Cut down eating out to once a week or less.
• Back up the computers.
• Enroll in a class for spring.
• Spend $500 or less on Thanksgiving vacation.

It’s harder to forget the goals when they’re right there to greet you every morning on your way to the kitchen.

Should you want to create your own goal board, call your local sign shop and ask them for a large piece of Coroplast. It’s a nice inexpensive plastic that looks like cardboard. Ask them to grommet the corners — that means they’ll add metal-reinforced holes so it’s super easy to hang. Don’t pay more than $15.

If you can’t find someone who will sell it at a reasonable price, you can either call up a plastic supply company directly to buy the Coroplast, or you can get creative and use another material. Posterboard hung with sticky-tack would be just about as effective. I just wanted something huge that I could change quite frequently.

Even my big ole billboard will become invisible to me if I don’t mix it up every week or two. This weekend I plan to seek out pictures of goals — like mountains, where I want to live, and a beautiful house — and post them up as well.

I plan to call the previously barren beige wall my Wall of Dreams.

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Happy Moment of the Day

The boat has proven once again to be our means of transportation into the land of happiness.

After a long hard week, we were both set on taking the boat out, even if it meant homework and housework had to be put off. We were not disappointed. The first stroke of luck came by the dumpster.

Someone had left two little pappasan chairs out next to it, and they looked like just the thing to get an awning going. For the awning I’m planning, I need two poles on each side that extend from a little clamp that will let them swing freely. The pappasan chairs appeared to have just that sort of clamp in their fold-up frames.

Not only did they have that kind of clamp, one was in nearly perfect condition, so I snagged both of them. Amazingly, the unbroken one fit right into my half of the boat, so I spent half the evening lounging in my new soft chair. It was lovely.

We got lots of bites, but the only big fish we caught — Hubby says it was about 5 pounds, and I happen to be the one who caught it — was a female. Wanting to ensure that lots of little baby fishes would be born, we threw her back. All the others were more like two-pounders, and since I can’t clean fish without losing my lunch and Hubby really wasn’t in the mood, we came home without a catfish dinner.

But the relaxation was priceless.

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1. Ask your friends and family what they see you doing in 10 years. You might be surprised at what they point out. If you see a pattern in the responses you get, it may provide a clue to something you have been overlooking — or a clue as to what you are doing wrong.

If everyone agrees you “should” be doing one thing, figure out why — have you been pursuing something you hate to the point that everyone, including you, can only see you staying on that same track? If you’re pursuing all the wrong things, you may be so surrounded by what you don’t love that you can’t even imagine what you would love.

2. Seek out people who have a real passion for life. Look for someone with so much enthusiasm they absolutely shine with happiness and confidence. Just spending time with them will give you energy and motivation to find your own goals.

Ask them what made them discover their passion, and their responses will provide clues as to what you can do. After you hear their story, ask them what they would suggest you do as you search for your passion. And don’t be shy — if they know you well at all, ask them what they see as your special talents or interests.

3. Eliminate things that stifle your creativity or take up your time without giving you any benefit. If you’re spending all your waking hours doing something you hate, you don’t have time to dream about what you love — let alone pursue it. Some things in life (buying the groceries, doing the laundry) are necessary, but others are best left to those who have that passion.

4. Start a journal. Write for a few minutes at the beginning and end of each day. By taking time to write, you will focus your thoughts more naturally on finding your passion, and by having everything in black and white, you may be able to play “connect the thoughts.” Things are often hidden from us because we don’t step back to analyze our thoughts.

5. Find what you hate. If you have trouble brainstorming about the things you love or would like to try, sometimes it’s easier to focus on the negative. Write down anything and everything that bothers you, write out an elaborate description of your Job from Hell, and then consider the exact opposite.

6. Examine your hobbies. Maybe you can’t read or go biking for a living, but I bet you can find a creative way to use your knowledge to open a great store. A used book store where you can proudly recommend your favorite books, or a bike shop where you can counsel new bikers on what type of bike to buy and where the best trails are, might be just what you need.

7. Help someone else achieve their goals. Many people find that their true passion is helping others. If you love some of the things you do at work but hate your job, maybe you should be teaching what you know. As motivational author Zig Ziglar says, “You will get all you want in life if you help enough people get what they want.”

8. Related to #7, volunteer and try new things. Work at a food pantry; help out at a soup kitchen for Thanksgiving; volunteer at an animal shelter. The possibilities are a far wider range than you might think. If you can’t think of anything offhand that sounds like you, try visiting Volunteer.gov, where you can find less typical ways of helping, like translating a website for a national park. This will give you a chance to try new things, and just the simple fact that you’re making a difference may be exactly what you’re looking for.

9. Read self-help books on how to find your passion. For starters, try Barbara Sher’s I Could Do Anything if I Only Knew What it Was: How to Discover What You Really Want.

This is really just a basic list of ideas to get you started on your quest to find your passion. Once you really focus on the journey, it will begin to come naturally to you to think of ideas all the time. Brainstorm new ideas to stretch your imagination on your morning commute; watch some new TV channels like the Travel Channel or the Science Channel to broaden your horizon. What other ways have you found to discover new passions?

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